part 6

It turns out time didn’t tell exactly what I expected to hear, but that’s just life right? I mean that is what everyone always says, so why exactly is it so difficult to understand? Oh, just listen to me blabbing along, thinking out loud, carrying on for myself, while you sit there probably confused out of your mind by what I’m saying. So let’s take you back to what you may have missed dear notebook.

Months ago I assumed by only problem was telling my best friend that I had become ‘closer’ to Luaay. Sadly it seems that that relationship was all too ‘rocky’ from the beginning.

Two weeks after saying yes and agreeing to a date with Luaay, a friend of his (Ahmed) sent me a message, it was a recorded conversation between him and Luaay.

Ahmed: what do you mean bro, you totally scored with Nazrana…

Luaay: do I look like I give a sh* t?

Ahmed: then why are you even with here? You must have some interest or else you really wouldn’t just string her along for a joyride. What’s the deal here?

Luaay: you what Ahmed, loss the topic bru

Ahmed: listen, I’ll drop it if you fill me in on what’s going on here.

Luaay: this doesn’t concern you ahmed!!

Ahmed: chill would you! The only reason I’m asking is because there must be a reason for why you’re messing with Niraz’s sister…

Luaay: exactly! Wow, a round of applause to you Ahmed, you seem to have cracked the code! Welcome to reality bro! (Ever so sarcastically said)

Ahmed: Niraz hey?

Luaay: well wasn’t that obvious?

Ahmed: you better get one thing straight here, it is not Niraz you’re speaking to right now! You better be clear on that. And I didn’t think you were low enough to mess Naz around just because you have some petty issue with her brother!!

Luaay: petty? Now you listen to me because I suggest you take a walk since you don’t know what you’re talking about!

Ahmed: I know what I’m saying. The only cocky prick here is you!

Luaay: since when does whatever happens to Nazrana bother you?

Ahmed: since you’ve forgotten she’s human too.

Luaay: so?

Ahmed:just give it up Luaay, its not worth it man…

Luaay: but its so worth it Ahmed!!! You don’t even know what that Niraz did to my cousin Ahlaam, yet you stand here defending those Ismails!

Ahmed: wha…

That was it, I couldn’t take any more of it. I may never be able to listen to any more of that voice note but I felt broken. Actually, I felt more than just that, I felt gutted, it all made me so upset. Could someone really be so cruel? Someone I had known as a good friend for ages had shown me the darker side I quite frankly wasn’t prepared for.

I was even more amazed at how Luaay acted ever so sweetly and went along with his plan. After witnessing this for two days, I was fed up, I blocked Luaay and avoided all contact with him. The only thing left to do now was confront Niraz about Ahlam, who surprisingly, I had never heard of before…

I had to find a way to ask my brother without him suspecting anything, but he would find out easily. Niraz was always a step ahead when it came to things like this. It was as if he had people devoured to filling him in on everything he may have felt necessary to know, and after already being hurt by Luaay, there was no way I was going to let my brother have a go at me next. So I decided on doing the next best thing.

Ask Nazeer.

I figures he might have been more understanding and willing to fill me in on this story, I however, didn’t plan on being completely honest with him either. There were certain things he just didn’t need to know regardless of how close we had become, and this was one of em.

Later during the very same day, I went up to nazeer and asked him if he knew who ahlaam was and so yet another convo began…

Nazeer: why are you suddenly asking me this?

Me: I just heard some stuff…

Nazeer: tell me what you heard

Me: well nothing really besides that there was something between the two of them…

Nazeer: thats all you need to know then

Me: really? Don’t treat me like a little kid, clearly something happened

Nazeer: just don’t worry about that please

Me: I don’t get this

Nazeer: there’s not much to it,chill man

Me: doesn’t sound like it

Nazeer: you’re not going to give this up are you?

Me: nope haha now spill!

Nazeer: fine, Niraz dated her about a year ago. Happy now?

Me: so thats it huh?

Nazeer: yep

Me: there must be something you’re not telling me here

Nazeer: look Nazy I don’t even care,nits not even my story to tell…

Me: urrrgh!! What is it with you people?!!

I definitely was going to et anywhere with this, but I wanted to know so badly! Maybe Ahmed would tell me what he knew. Wait, I could just listen to the recording again right…? Wrong! I deleted it in a moment of anger. Smart move Naz!

This was all becoming a bit much, maybe all I really needed to do was speak to Ahlaam. Who knows, I might just manage to get the story from her…


Hey everyone.

I am sooooo sorry for disappearing for so long. Many changes have taken place, but I’m back now!! Looking forward to sharing Nazrana’s story with you all.  Hope you enjoy…

With love,



Part 5 – Time could only tell

Me: tell me already!!!

Nazeer: so there’s this girl Rushda, we were invited to see her, kinda like a samoosa run you know…

Me: you went on a samoosa run without telling me? Hey no fair

Nazeer: can I continue now?

Me: yes, go on, I’m dying to know more

Nazeer: Rushda comes from a very islamically inclined family. I’ve always preferred doing things in a correct manner which appeals to me, so when mummy and her mum spoke about us meeting her, I agreed.

Me: ( laughing)  the fact that you even went on a samoosa run is gonna take a while to sink in…

Nazeer: are you done laughing?

Me: alright, alright, I’m done now, how bad could it have been though?

Nazeer: believe me, if you thought that me going on a samoosa run was crazy, this story gets a whole lot weirder…

Me: spill man!!

Nazeer: patience.

Me: I just found out that my brother, or in this case, one of my brothers, just went on a samoosa run. How could you possibly expect me to be patient?

Nazeer: so we get to this house, and everything seems normal, it was actually as typical as I’d expected. I had the awkward conversations with her family, like honestly, there should be a guidebook for what you should and shouldn’t say. Its just so nerve wrecking! But back to the story, like I said it was normal, Rushda wasn’t in sight though. Now surely if I’m supposed to ” meet” this girl then I actually have to see her right?

Me: right…?

Nazeer: well in this case I wish I actually hadn’t met her at all!

Me: why?

Nazeer: it started when they realised we were waiting to meet madam Queen, there were tons of whispers amongst them, but I just assumed that this girl was as nervous as I was. It had been like 1 hour though and it was time to face the music, so I asked if I could speak to her.

Me: …

Nazeer: they sent someone upstairs to call her and exactly 37 minutes later did she only choose to make her appearance, but what does that matter, when she walks in with wet hair and only a towel around herself! Like what the hell? was that even necessary?

Me: okay you’re just kidding right?

Nazeer: Nazrana do I look like I’d make up some ridiculous story about meeting a girl like that?

Me: well, I guess not…

Nazeer: Her family was clearly stunned, her father didn’t know what to do with himself and it showed all too well. Then just when I thought this couldn’t get any crazier she pulls me, like literally drags me out the lounge and tells me I need to say no to marrying her because she has a boyfriend and is in a “very serious relationship”! Did she really think she stood a chance after the show she just put on? (slight laugh) no man what nonsense!

Me: so what was going on with you and Niraz earlier?

Nazeer: oh that…

Me: yeah, I know he generally does have a habit of acting like that, but it was just odd…

Nazeer: alright so check, when this Rushda girl was done speaking to me, she ran back upstairs, when she got back – this time looking presentable- she saw Niraz sitting next to me, he had just arrived.

Me: and let me guess, she went for him?

Nazeer: well of course she went for him and he was all too happy to tolerate it, and only on our way back home did we find out why!

Me: why?

Nazeer: Nazy are you always in the dark?

Me: Pretty much most of my life, yes. (laughing)

Nazeer: Niraz is the boyfriend!

Me: whaaaaat thee efff? (in utter shock) you’re kidding me right? I did not see that coming…

Nazeer: I really don’t understand Niraz, why didn’t he at least tell me? I would have never gone to see her. but no! instead he pretends to offer his support. (laughing) ay I give up…

Me: this situation sucks, I’m really sorry you had to go all of this, you really didn’t deserve it. and for what its worth, i’m glad you learnt the truth now rather than being assumed by an elaborate lie.

Nazeer: that’s true hey. You know you’re actually really amazing to talk to little sis…

Me: awww you’re not too bad either, at what 3:27am!

Nazeer: (side hug) I need sleep now, see ya…

Me: sleep tight

My brothers were more than insane and this was enough proof. Usually I would have argued for not being notified but in this case I was all too happy about being left out, although I wouldn’t have minded a front row seat to some drama! Soon enough it was close to 4am and I was beyond exhausted! I dragged myself towards my room, got tucked in and within seconds I was in the land of dreamers’. And just when I thought id get to sleep all day, the humans I know and love decided it was time to wake Nazrana up! Remind me again why exactly I chose to invite them over? Oh yes! Luaay!! Damn I’ve been so engrossed in the strange family events that were taking place, that I’d actually not had time to think about telling them! I guess i’ll just tell them today and get over with it already.

Me: weirdos ii neeed to tell you guys something…

Diyanah: go right ahead.

Layla: yeah talk talk

Me: Layla, the indian in you is showing way too much! (laughing)

Layla: well my coloured half cant tone that down either, now would you just tell us already Nazy!

Me: alright, alright, so yesterday when you guys asked about Luaay, I know I said we’re friends but that’s just because I sort of panicked and wasn’t sure of what you guys might say. The truth is, he asked my out yesterday and I actually said yes, well no was too heavy but that’s a story for another day… (I was as red as anything and tried covering my face but there was no escape)

All 3: oooooooohhmyyworrrrrdNazzzz!! (lots on giggling and surrounding me)  That’s great!

Diyanah: soo… the future Mrs Kara hey?

Me: maybeee ( once again I had turned bright red, I had it bad already!)

Waliyah: Nazrana Ismail, there was no reason to be afraid of what we would have thought, of course we’re going to support you no matter what!

Layla: I do have one question for you though…

Me: and what might that be?

Layla had sat there thinking for quite a while, she looked as if she had put a great amount of thought into whatever she was going to ask me and it honestly made me feel slightly nervous. She was always a quick thinker and great at strategizing, being such a calculated person, I knew her question would matter, I just wasn’t prepared for it…

Layla: well, when and how exactly do you plan on telling Zaiyaan about this? You cant exactly hide it from someone you’re always around.

I chose not to answer her question, but was I really ever going to tell Zaiyaan…

Time could only tell.

Loads Of Love


Part 4- Rock Or Pebble?

On a huge boulder the word ‘NO’ was written and next to it lay a pebble no bigger than my palm with the word ‘YES’ and a heart written slightly towards the side of it.  I was certain of my decision but then another thought crossed my mind when I saw paint and a brush near the stream. I scanned around in search of a pebble and painted a response.  When I got back to the car, “Mr Calm” looked more like a nervous wreck on the verge of a mental breakdown, it was quite an amusing site to be fairly honest. Once I got into the car, it was my turn to have a little fun, so I just sat there without uttering a single word. He quickly became fidgety then finally spoke.

Him: well….?

Me: isn’t this view just the greatest? (imitating him)

Him: Don’t torture me Naz!!

Me: ….

Him: So… Rock or pebble?

I handed my ‘modified’ pebble over to him. It read:  “NO😉” He starred at the pebble in utter disbelief, unable to speak. The poor guy looked horrified. After I was satisfied with what I had just done, I slowly handed over the pebble he had left near the stream. His face lit up immediately!

Him: Were you trying to kill me? (laughing,smiling and breathing a sigh of relief all at once)

Me: Maybee…

Him: No other girl would have ever thought of doing something like that and giving me a mini heart attack Miss Nazy. I guess I no longer have any escape from the devil running through your mischievous little mind, either way, I think its totally worth it. You’re worth it…

Talking to someone quickly and easily becomes extremely different when feelings are involved. So here I was, with one of my friends, someone I was used to being crazy around, yet he and I were suddenly more wary of ourselves. Surprisingly we spoke more in one afternoon than we did in 3 years. Time went by faster than I’d imagined and soon enough it was time for me to leave. I had two ‘additional’ parents unfortunately and eventually one of them would call. Are all older brothers seriously like this or am I the only one who seems to have run out of luck?

Me: Its getting late, I should probably get home. I didn’t tell anyone I’d be out and about today…

Him: Yeah sure, maybe plans again soon?

Me: I like the sound of that :p

Him: Alright well I’ll see you soon, bye angel…

Me: Uhm… Bye…?

Him: …

Me: You do realize we’re at the top of a hill and that you need to take me back to the coffee shop, right?

Him: Ooooh Yes!! That totally slipped my mind… I’m so sorry (clearly embarrassed)

Me: (laughing) Its okaaay

*A few minutes later*

Him: I believe I owe you a proper goodbye now.

Me: Nono, I don’t believe in the concept of ‘goodbyes’, I simply follow the ’til we meet again’.

Him: Well in that case, till we meet again love (I swear it sounded like the words of Klaus Mikaelson rather than Luaay Kara)

As I drove home I caught myself smiling for no reason. Well, there was a reason, I just didn’t think it would get me this bad! Did today really happen? It all felt like some crazy dream, but it wasn’t, and right now I was genuinely happy about something so no complaints from meee. His letter kept playing through my mind, I’m quite sure our story won’t be anything like the lives of fictional characters but it will be a story after all, and I know it’ll certainly have more meaning to me than any other.

When I arrived home, I was pleasantly surprised to see my brothers were not around and neither were my parents. This might just be my favorite day of the year so far! Party for one here I come!! I entered the house and walked straight to the kitchen – I needed food. On the kitchen counter lay a note from my mother, it read:

Slmz Naz

We’re invited for supper tonight. Thought you might want to skip…

enjoy your evening and be good doll

love you, mummy

Two notes in one day? what was this world coming to? Mum would usually just send me a message, she must have really been planning for this supper. I wonder what could have been so important yet wasn’t necessary to include me in, I’d rather not wreck my brain on that though. I zombie walked up the stairs and made my way to my room. As I opened the door, I was given the fright of my life!

Me: (in shock) oooh gosh!! Were you two mental cases trying to kill me!?

Waliyah: hmm … tough call. Maybe :p

Diyanah: C’mon, no need to lie to her Liya. Of course we’re here to murder her (laughing)

Me: Then you may see yourself out

Diyanah: Yeaah sure, I’ll just take all the food I prepared with m-

Me: (cutting her off) Im sorry but did you just say you brought food?

Waliyah: I’m pretty sure that’s what she said…

Me: Well in that case, please make yourself at home! (laughing)

Diyanah: So where were you today missy?

Me: I was at the coffee shop

Waliyah: wiiiiiiiiiith??

Diyanah: The one and only Mr. Luaay Kara

Me: How did you know that? (I think I sounded too curious, but who cares, I actually was!)

Diyanah: The same way I know every other thing about you – we’re best friends Naz, even though I just guessed it, I figured it would be right anyway…

Me: Yeaaah that is very true :p

Waliyah: so spill already!

Me: what?

Diyanah: what, are you seriously going to play dumb and not tell us?

Me: Well, we’re friends, he’s nice-ish. What more is there to say??

Waliyah: (laughing) well alright then…

Me: Why don’t we have a sleepover tonight?

Diyanah: Sounds great to me

Me: Awesome! Liya please call Layla and tell her to get here like right now. Tell her its my dying wish if you have to, just get it done please. I’m going to shower, wont be long…

So I lied to my best friends about Luaay! Nazrana Ismail what is wrong with you!? I panicked and didn’t tell them. There was nothing I was hiding, but sometimes the thoughts your best friends may have about something can be more meaningful and treasured than we’d expect them to be. Maybe I just wanted them to see him in a similar way to what I did. My back up plan seemed to be a last resort – a sleepover it was, after a very,very long time. I have to be honest, I was really excited!

Layla arrived and soon enough our sleepover was in full swing. As it got later, our deep conversations began, everyone seemed to enjoy going down memory lane. Being able to share great memories with people dear to you is priceless. I may have been having a seriously, unbelievably amazing day thus far, but this had to be the highlight. I was now ready to “spill the deets” and as life would have it, my family walked into the house…

Mum: What a disrespectful girl! Ya Allah, I never want to see her again.

Nazeer: Look, I don’t even want to talk about it, okay? (clearly upset)

Niraz: You guys are being so dramatic (laughing)

Nazeer: Niraz I’d appreciate it if you learnt to shut your damn mouth!

Niraz: Someone’s cranky (laughing)

Dad: Niraz, be quiet.

They were all silent once they realized there was an audience of 4 clearly in shock. My best friends are allowed to know that my family in insane – that is perfectly acceptable, but I never wanted them to see this. Right now all I could think of was what might have happened tonight. Was there something they hadn’t told me all this time? I had never seen Nazeer so upset in my life. He was always calm and bubbly and always seemed to have the right advice. I wouldn’t have given it much thought if it was Niraz, he seemed to deal with himself pretty well, but Nazeer had always paid more attention to my life and seeing his pain made me want to cry…

Later that night – morning actually, I was extremely restless. There was no way I’d get any sleep with so many thoughts racing through my mind, so I decided to get up and get something to drink. On my way back up I noticed Nazeer’s room door open and decided to check if my sad big bro was doing alright, there was no one in room though, I then remembered that he’d be out on the balcony whenever he was deep in thought so I opened the doors and stepped out.

Me: I thought I’d find you here…

Nazeer: Whatcha need Nazy? (forcing a smile)

Me: Well nothing, I was worried about you so ii thought I’d come and see if you were okay.

Nazeer: I’m fine, I promise, now you don’t need to be so worried about me…

Me: I cant sleep anyway. Why don’t we get something to munch on and chill inside?

Nazeer: Under normal circumstances I would have said no thank you, but I am hungry and cold so sure why not..

I’ve probably mentioned how good my day was about 3 or 4 times but now I certainly just consider it rather eventful! Nazeer and I spent about an hour just talking which was strange but in all honesty truly amazing. I then finally found the courage to ask him about what had happened.

Nazeer: Its a long story naz

Me: long story as in “I don’t wanna talk about it” or “it really is a long story”?

Nazeer: (laughing) a bit of both but here it goes anyway…

And so the story began…
Much Love


Authors Note:


  • A very special thanks to the lovely author of Zaakirahs simple yet complex life for   recommending our blog. ❤️👍.    
  • The next post will be published after eid.            
  • Feel free to share your thoughts on ‘L’ with us. 

Many thanks to all our readers for your love and support.  Have a blessed end to this auspicious month and a wonderful eid 


Part 3: A question for you

He seemed so calm. What was this all about? Because I seriously didn’t have the slightest clue as to what was going on. Who asks to hang out, decides to take you to the top of some hill or whatever and then chooses to remain silent? Is that normal? This is someone I’m quite close to, but he seems to be acting ever so strangely today and that worried me. My ‘nerves’ had seemed to have kicked in right on time as well because my hands shook uncontrollably and I barely managed to sit still!! “Nazrana get your sh*t together…” I silently cursed to myself. Finally, after what felt like a lifetime, ‘Mr. Calm’ on the side of me noticed just how uneasy this was all making me and began speaking. About time man!

Him: Isn’t this view just the greatest?

Me: (the view? seriously) Yeah, I couldn’t agree more. (I breathed a sigh of relief and looked up) Its beautiful and different. I guess there’s a lot more to this place than we thought…

Him: (looking at me) Beautiful and Different – you know that sounds kinda like you. This is my thinking spot actually, don’t judge. I’ve actually never brought anyone here before. This is temporarily my greatest escape…

Me: I’m more on the lines of what I would call ‘weird different’, besides what made you want to share your beautiful escape with me out of all people?

Him: C’mon Naz, you said it yourself – Beautiful and Different – those were your words but right only I seem to know the link. you give yourself too little credit you know…

Me: We’ve been friends for ages, you should know by now that I just don’t see that comparison. I see that this place really was made for deep convos though…

Him: Well I happen to have some news for you. I see it every single day! You amaze me in so many ways. (looking directly into my eyes) I’m going to make this simple – I love you Naz…

Me: … (whaaaaaaat??)

Him: I figured this would all stun you and be a lot to take in, but please come with me because there’s somewhere I’d like to take you.

Within seconds he was out the car and walking over to my side. I barely processed everything that had just happened and hadn’t uttered a word but the door was now open so instinctively I got out and we began walking until we arrived near a stream a few meters down.

Him: (laughing) Don’t worry Nazy, I’m not a murderer. I just have one question for you…

Me: … (was I ever going to find the courage to speak at this rate?)

Him: I’m going to leave you here with my question and you can bring me your answer. I’ll be waiting in the car, please take your time…

He then handed me a card and walked away.

It read:

Dear Nazrana

I would have loved to tell you everything in the way you describe the lives of fictional characters in novels you’ve always told me about. Sadly, we both know that I’m no great writer or poet, but what I can tell you is that I am certain of my feelings and mean every word I say. I’ve said all I can think of for now and you know how I feel, behind you lies your answer, will you go out with me? 😉



A million thoughts raced through my mind. As I turned and looked to where my answers ‘lay’, I couldn’t help but laugh…



Part 2: All in due time

I decided to delete the pictures and make a few changes. I desperately needed my brothers to trust me so that there wouldn’t  be any future ‘episodes’ and because I honestly didn’t want them going to ‘overprotective brotherly extremes’ again.


I was snapped out of my thoughts by the sound of my phone buzzing.

“meet me at the coffee shop in 10”

“sure” I replied

That is the one moment I regret the most, it may be a simple 4 letter word that allowed a meeting at a coffee shop and I cannot deny that my choices seemed worthwhile at that time but I wish I had known better.

*at the coffee shop*

“Hey, you’re very early today” (sarcasm)

“Don’t be judging, I follow Indian time” (raising my hand in the air, in a total drama queen fashion)

He laughs, “You’re crazy Naz, I’ve already ordered for us, c’mon let’s take a drive..”

“uhm.. okay”

We got into his car and began driving around. We drove to the peak of a hill, something seemed strange though. The setting was breathtakingly beautiful but neither of us had uttered a word in 15 minutes and this was becoming mighty awkward, I kept wondering if I was being pranked, what on Earth was this all about?!

“So…”, he finally said

“I don’t mean to seem rude, but why exactly did you bring me here?” I asked

“Oh NazNaz, you ask way too many questions, all will be revealed in due time dear” He responded calmly.

“All will be revealed in due time”? what the hell was that supposed to mean? I thought but decided not to ask.

Feedback please 🙂


Part 1: I am Nazrana Ismail

As I entered the house, I was greeted by an eerie silence. I slowly walked towards the kitchen, where I found my elder twin brothers sitting  with angered facial expressions. The silence didn’t quite scare me, however their creased facial features did. I was quite certain I was in trouble but decided to play it cool instead. 

Me: errr … Hey guys 

Nazeer: and just where did that salaam disappear to? 

Me: uhm .. As salaamualaykum 

Niraz: well actually, I think is prefer her ‘hey’ considering it suits the pictures she’s uploaded on Instagram a whole lot better! 

Me: what pictures? We’re you seriously stalking me? ( panick and annoyance) 

Niraz: well missy I have every right and considering the things you might be up to, I think you should just shut your mouth!! 

Nazeer: alright Niraz, I think you’ve said enough, cool down bro, I’ll take it from here… Go walk it off.  

Niraz stormed off ,uttering every profanity known to man and slammed the door shut behind him. Now it was time to deal with the wannabe mufti,Nazeer…

Personally, I couldn’t decide which was worse. 

Nazeer: I’m going to be quite clear about certain things. Mummy and daddy may be lenient with you but Niraz and I will not! It is not islamically correct in any way to dress or take pictures of yourself in such skimpy clothing. I’m not asking you to become a saint but atleast behave modestly. Are you not concerned about the hereafter??!

Me: jee…(the only word that would not get me into any more trouble)

And with that I was off. They may have found about my ‘inappropriate’ dressing and the pics I post, but you know how it goes, in order to keep some secrets hidden, others must be revealed….

Much love